Turns out I'm not the only one who likes my new apartment.
The other day I came home to find one of my plants lying on the floor, and the foam padding next to my in-window air-conditioner was loose on one side. I examined the foam and noticed that the the accordion spacer thingies next to the air-conditioner had a large hole in it. Judging by the ragged edges of the hole I decided that it must have been made by a squirrel.
Unless a squirrel is a flying squirrel that hangs out with a talking moose, I am not interested in being its roommate. Perhaps it's because a neighbor kid was bitten by a squirrel when I was a little girl. The neighbor kid had to get a series of rabies shots -- in the stomach. Or maybe it's because the squirrels at my high school were bold and aggressive little creatures (the same has been said of me at times, I suppose.)
So, the last thing I want in my house is a squirrel. I taped up the foam as best I could and then I crept around the house looking for squirrels. I tiptoed to the coat closet and put my ear to the door. Did I hear something shift around in there? Was that a scratching sound? I grabbed the door handle and began to turn it and just as I was about to open the door I realized that I didn't have the slightest idea what I would do if I did find a squirrel in the closet.
I would shut the door, push a chair up against it and call Animal Control, that's what I'd do.
But what if I found a squirrel under my bed? How would I be able to fearlessly tidy up my room before I called Animal Control? I wouldn't want the Animal Control guys -- who might be cute and maybe even single -- to show up at an untidy house.
I was in agony!
But, I bravely continued and checked inside each closet, under the bed, under the sofa, under each chair, behind the window shades and anywhere else in my apartment I thought a squirrel might hide. Or have squirrel babies. I shuddered at the thought.
to be continued....
Posted by: MarcAnthony Michael Ouckama | Nov 03, 2005 at 01:57 PM